Performance show...sigh...I have been SOOOOOOO waiting for this...
How long has it been? Oh yes, since last September!!!!!
I have snark, I have weee!, I have ear damage?!?!?? LOL, the following is said with much love to and for our hamsters...good on y'all for having the balls to go up there and bust a move...but know, some of you shall be busting a move right back outta that posh little mansion, so drink heartily out of those purty red goblets, drink while you still can!!!!!!
So, my oh my, where to start...
Biggest surprise, I cannot believe I 'like' you: Ryan Star. Wow, really dug his version of Iris. First off, songs I like, are usually the ones I HATE to see covered, lest they suck. Fortunately, I totally felt this version. I find it interesting the contrast of what is portrayed here of our Mr Star, v. the crafty editing of the online reality show. Things that make you go hmmmm... Also, combine this with the live reviews versus what those same folks saw on their TV. Me thinks we are all being a bit set up. I cannot decide which one of us it 'tis. We shall see. As for snark, well...dude, *SMILE*!!! But NOT during the sensitive parts! LOL...before the song, after the song, in the rocker pod...these are the times you are allowed to smile...let us see those pearly whites!!! Rocker Angst face...while you're rocking, dude...just sayin...
Biggest Cringe, ala, am I watching AI?!?!??! Yellow, Matt, just, NO! Sorry, this is where the whole cover thing, for me, was a big *strike out*...Yikes! I *love* this song, and apparently, I *love* Chris Martin singing it...who knew! As for my AI note, I felt as if I was hearing Paula, Simon and Randy...WTF were the *SN dudes* smokin...they liked that?!? Either someone needs to clean their ears, or what y'all heard in the studio, and what I heard on my TV were 2 VERY DIFFERENT things... But whatever, they aren't paying me to make records, sigh ;) As for our dear Matty's non vocals...haircut, just sayin, show us those pretty eyes!
Biggest I cannot believe I am wishing for *Ty & Suzie* to sing these songs to me: My cutie pie Chris, and my without Personality Phil?!?!?! What happened? Well, apparently, Roxanne, hard song? There was so much wrong, I don't know who to feel worst for, Chris or Roxanne!?!?! and Apparently, Ty, had the right amount of Personality?!?!?! Phil, babe, please stick to the hollering, because whatever you were doing did not...it just did not. What happened to your cult, babe? I would follow it, just sayin... But, hey, you both looked good, cuties x 2!
The Snooze factor: Patrice...word to whoever said, well, just word...It ain't pretty. That said, she comes off better when you don't watch. Not sure that is what we are here for though, this is Rockstar, not Vocal All star. I don't know, maybe she will win me over. I hope so. I can't really say anything about her stripy hair or bra/webby sweater ensemble, can I!?!? Nice Tats?!?! For now, I am left meh...not good, not bad, not particulary snarkable...just meh.
Sweet Home...not from Alabama...Dana...What, this is not the AI set...oopsies!!! Pretty girl, nice figure, lovely voice. That's all I'm sayin....
The Iceman cometh...and it was NOT Satisfying...I am sad. I kinda think Magni is a cutie, bald and all. But he should have shed the jacket, and strutted that song out. It requires attitude, not schlumping rocker. Sigh, come on Iceman, I REALLY want to like ya! Hmmm, maybe if I was his personal stylist it would all change? Do ya think!?!? I think I shall submit my resume...
Stayin' Alive, Leprechaun Style...Where is Don Johnson, because I think he wants his WHITE Jacket Back!!!! Lukas...my Rebel Yell boy...less jacket, and STEP away from the keg!...lol...and yet, YOU STILL BROUGHT IT. Lukas really leaves me confused. I liked his presence. I liked his attitude. But, I think he sounds ALL kinds of slurry on the vocals. Am I the only one? But whatever, it still works, more or less. I am very interested to see where my little lucky charm Rebel Boy will take us next. I have a feeling I will get to snark and love on him for quite a while.
So, with that bit of love, lucky charms style, I can now mourn my poor little tone deaf ears, right? Well, whatever, even my ears tried to retreat and escape our dear little Zayra's wails...eek! I am not going to belabor this...but WTF was my *SN dude* crush, Jason, doing, on bended knee!?!?! proposing?!?!? No, just no...it never happened...nope, didn't see it, never happened.
Jenny...wasn't she the sick chick!?!??! I am the firm belief that Tall Skinny Blonde chicks should not sing pop versions of Nickelback. That said, apparently blondes in short skirts are admired?!?!? *shocker* I am chalking this up to whatever. Her hair was shiny, and she seems like a nice person.
Next up, introducing, Noxema Man, 2006...dude, Josh's skin is so purty...does he use pore minimizer or what?!?!?! Seriously, I *hate* him, lol...he has better skin than any of the chicks for goodness sakes! Oh, he sang, he's good, but seemed a bit country rock to me...and what is he, 12?!?!? Anyway, Skin Council of America...call this dude...STAT!
Now it is time, my friends...to venture to the land...Down Unda! For my man, *da' surfer dude*, the Tobster...cuz' he's, knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door...uhmmm, who's there?!?! Oh, hot strappin' Aussie lad...how goes it mate, ya wanna...oh, sorry, I digress, lol. Anywho, the Tobster, can sing(and sit); and I think the *SN dudes* were likin' him. I predict the Tobster may be a sleeper hit in this pack of hamsters.
Ok, now, who got 'sauce'?!?!? Jill... well this itty bitty bit of blonde ringlets apparently does...And girlfriend can rock it...However, it is just a bit too perky for me. But again, turn away, and she has GREAT voice. I don't know what to make of her. I can't see this little ball of engergy fronting our dudes of testosterone...I can't. But, this little gal has some pipes. And pretty curls, so I gotta love her just a little. Even if she does spin, and go 'wee' all around...I am hopeful she is not also dreamin of rainbows and unicorns...*crosses fingers*
Now, I feel a Storm comin' on...a Storm Large...seriously, that Name, TOO easy, easy...This chick has edge, and I would put forth that she brought it on a song, that did her no favors. She brought it ANYWAY, in fact, IN SPITE of it. I am seriously waiting for this chick to Bring It on a song that matches her vibe. I think she will freakin' blow the roof off. I am looking forward to her blowing up BIG. LOL, and this gal, could teach *Peaches* a thing or two about a proper *eyefuck*, just sayin...and from what I hear(not seen), her and the batshit would have a love triangle going w/the mic/stands and whatnot...yikes-ohs!
Dilana, Dilana...I am backing this chick... I dig her funky, funny looking sqawking chicken rocker chick vibe. She was so intense during her *still* version of Lithium...You knew she was going to explode at any moment...going nuts, you just had no idea...I like her anyway. She knows her style. She knows how to kick ass, her way. I hope she can maintain. That intensity almost scares me...
Overall, I am quite happy with this years batch of hamsters. Can't love them all. But I like quite a few. As one might have surmised, I have 5 faves...Dilana, Lukas, Ryan, Storm, and Toby...I think they all have something I want more of. Not to mention, they will all allow much room for snark, with love, rather than just snark ...and I won't feel so mean. The rest, meh, I hope they have a good time, and get something out of it...
And a special shout out to the McHotties that are still our beloved House Band...I have seen Paul in person...and kablewy...he is hot stuff, lol...And Rafael, sigh, Sasha, double sigh...Jim, I'm a likin...Nate, where'd the flyin whatevers go...oh well, you still kick it back there...These guys continue to amaze me...they bring it on EVERY tune...They are ROCKSTAR...all the hamsters should bow down that these guys are playing for them....
And, last, but not least...our *SN dudes* + PPoD...All hot...Still crushin'on hotstuff Jason: I will forgive you this ONE time, one time...
Until tomorrow...I cannot wait!
As an added note, I *LOVE* how we all are seeing things a bit differently...it is going to be one fun summer.
eta...and *MAJOR* shout out to our own JYM...you are a *STAR*...
...this little ditty originally posted by myself over at Rockband.com
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